Holiness

Posted December 19th, 2003 by Sean Williams

There is very little that I do with my life that can be considered holy. Almost everything involves some sort of earthly pursuit and always has. There has always been this great battle for sex and money and sensual experience. Also, despite the fact that I take other people’s rituals very seriously, I have seldom taken my own with much more than a grain of salt.

The wedding that Jordana and I are about to have has been considered, for the last six months or so, a thing we are doing for other people. We have demurred and told people not to worry about it, we have laughed and tried to find ways to keep the whole thing grounded. Jordana in particular is the kind of person that desperately does not want to be the center of attention, and it has been painful for her, almost humiliating for her, to ask the people around her to do things for the wedding.

I think I may have turned a corner on the wedding. I think, considering the quality of the bride in this ceremony, that she ought to not be humble in asking for people’s help and input. There are people who are celebrated constantly, who crave attention and need celebrity, and these people generally get what they want. When you prioritize your life like that, you will achieve your goals.

Jordana is a very private person, a person who is not going to try for the spotlight, a person who will probably never have too many festivals held in her honor. But she should, and this wedding is one night where she will. This is not a night to be taken lightly, if fifty thousand dollars are going to exchange hands for this one night, and it is a night that is celebrating not only our union but the fact that this one beautiful strange creature, who has been wildly misunderstood her whole life, has a chance for marital happiness, then maybe everyone, inluding me, should take it very seriously.

The really wonderful thing about this is that my immediate family has been celebrating this wedding not only because Jordana makes me so happy, but because she makes them so happy. My mom said it best, that she was celebrating the marriage because she got to have Jordana join the family. So maybe I shouldn’t worry so much about it.